Ok, granted, us single mom’s were probably not what Beyoncé was
envisioning when she performed this song for the first time and the guys were
fantasizing about some bikini clad go-go dancing yoga instructor who just
turned 19 yesterday, but why not us?
Single mothers have a bad rep!
When we part ways with our ex and he moves on and typically upgrades –
not in my situation, which on a side note, stings a little worse because if you
left me, you should’ve done better than me exponentially!! But I digress, we do right by our children,
advocate for them and do whatever is necessary including a plethora of
sacrifices to make sure they have a stable, grounded and well-rounded
childhood. We take their fathers to
court for child support and hopefully put together a parenting plan that he’ll
actually use to visit and we’re called gold digging bitches. We decide to do this baby-raising thing on
our own and make our own money however we can and we’re stamped ratchet
bitches. WTF?! The common denominator is WE ARE TRYING TO
TAKE CARE OF OUR KIDS. Now, some of you
baby daddies made bad decisions on who you chose to be your baby’s mother, just
know, every time you decide to have sex the end result can always be a
child. So, if that’s not your end game,
don’t pond hop with your dingy! The same
goes for women; you are NOT a 7-11!
Single mothers want to be loved with for their children to loved and
adored they way the love and adore them.
If a woman ever tells you that this is NOT a package deal, RUN! You’ve been warned; no good mother/woman would
ever diss their child and abandons him/her for you. If their child is replaceable, so are you –
to the left to the left…! However, if
she says that she is a package deal, dudes get all crazy like and say they
don’t want to be a father especially to someone else’s kid – well then, get to
steppin’! Stop looking at me like I’m
BBQ pork hung up in a Chinese restaurant!
We want someone to love us and our children the same as you would if we
were together from the beginning and had this child together. If you can’t do that, take a hint from MC
Hammer, “you can’t touch this!”
Single mothers are strong. We
are a resilient bunch of women who combat the every day dual parent world. Through patronizing pity-filled eyes we are
judged and thought to be second-class parents.
Had it even occurred to some of you that some single parents are single
parents by choice? However, no matter how
strong we are, we want someone stronger, to hold and hug us, tell us it’ll be
ok and protect us. We want that one
person who has our back and we can feel safe and let our guard down. Blocking all that shade is exhausting.
Single mothers have been hurt in the worst kind of way. She is struggling to deal with her situation
– chosen or not – the best way she can.
When she decides to hit the dating scene again, it’s a hard
adjustment. We’re not like most girls
you meet at a bar, we’re grown and most of the time more mature. We have responsibilities that are much more
demanding than your regular bar star. We
have body issues – yes, all of us do – we had a child, things have stretched,
scarred and have been operated on. We have trust issues – if you don’t want to
be with me, walk away, but please don’t cheat on me after everything I’ve been
through. That’s just plain ole hurtful
and evil. Don’t be mad when I don’t
introduce you to my kids. ‘Nuff said, I
will do that when I feel safe and that’s on you.
Single mothers have a lot to offer the right person, especially a
person that is receptive and ready. We
are solid, stable and able to care for ourselves and our children, which means
we are able to care for the right man in the right situation, please don’t
treat us like we have H1NO TOUCHY virus, we are not aliens, we are not
contagious. We have our own – job,
money, car, home, stuff – we don’t need yours.
All types of people come from all types of places, don’t play house
with one and judge the remainder on crimes committed by past
indiscretions. I get it, one bad potato
ruins the sack; however, it’s just ONE BAD POTATO.
This is my 2 cents, my perspective, my thoughts, my generalizations –
this is not meant as a stereotype of all single mothers, single fathers,
potential mates of single parents, etc…All The Single Ladies - Beyonce
No comments:
Post a Comment